Halloween is America’s most patriotic holiday because it is a celebration of life and the founding spirit of ambition. For one night a year, every American has an equal opportunity to pretend that they are whatever they aspire to be,  free of society’s judgment.

Unlike Christmas, Valentine’s Day, and Easter, Halloween doesn’t endorse a specific religion’s history; in the case of former, it also doesn’t violate the constitutional separation of Church and State by being deemed a National Holiday.

Furthermore, Halloween also doesn’t impose a jingoistic and willfully ignorant understanding of history on Americans, unlike Columbus Day and Thanksgiving. Halloween isn’t about celebrating the national identity we’re expected to have, it’s about celebrating the individual identity we want to have.

If eccentric showoffs like Uncle Sam, Davy Crockett, and Paul Revere can achieve Folk Hero status, then there’s room for us ordinary Americans to make spectacles of ourselves once a year. And therein lies the ultimate patriotic truth: Halloween is Americans’ annual opportunity to, in the words of our Army, Be All That We Can Be.

Christopher Buckley, the son of the conservative icon William F Buckley, has resigned from The National Journal, the political journal that his father founded in 1955.

Mr. Buckley said he had “been effectively fatwahed by the conservative movement” after endorsing Barack Obama in a blog posting on TheDailyBeast.com.

In response to his endorsement of Barack Obama, conservatives bombarded Mr. Buckley with hate mail, both at the blog and at the National Review. In statements concerning his resignation, Mr. Buckley decried the conservatives’ difficulties in accepting ability and their “angry” discourse that followed his endorsement of Barack Obama.

As a final “Fuck You” to conservatives, Mr. Buckley spun Ronald Regan back at them by repeating his ironically appropriate quote: “I haven’t left the Republican Party. It left me”.

Under the administration of Republican Governor Robert Ehrlich, The Maryland State Police used terrorist watch lists to spy on non-violent political activists opposed to the Death Penalty and the Iraq War over a period of 14 months between 2005 and 2006.

Over 50 of these activists had their names entered into State and Federal Databases originally designed to track suspected terrorists. Similarly, the protest groups to which they belonged were similarly designated as terrorist organizations. According to Maryland State Police Superintendent Terrence Sheriden, these activists were sent letters of notifying them of this surveillance last Saturday.

Thomsas Hutchins, The retired Maryland State Police superintendent who originally authorized the domestic spying program defended it, saying that it was “a bullwark against potential violence caused by fringe people”. Pressed for further comment, Hutchinson added that he doesn’t “believe the First Amendment is any guarantee to those who wish to disrupt the government”.

Sow, this piece of news just hit the wire: according to an article in Time Magazine, Barack Obama called the McCain camp at 8:30 am to propose that they “issue a joint statement in support of a package to help fix the economy as soon as possible”.

The McCain camp used the six hours between the Barack Obama’s offer and their response to it to write a public statement in which they claimed responsibility for the idea. This public statement was, of course, issued immediately after this bi-partisan agreement was finalized.

In a lecherously transparent gesture of false humility, John McCain even went so far as to offer to “delay” Friday’s upcoming debate. How noble of John McCain to put off a debate which would his comparative political weakness.

So, as if this is a surprise to anybody, the Bush administration is suppressing news that might enable the American Electorate to make an informed voting decision.

No, this time it doesn’t have to do with Bush’s lack of military service, the criminal wrongdoings of his associates,  or the non-existence of Iraq’s WMDs.

This piece of politically-inconvenient news concerns the reality of the war in Afghanistan (that “other” place we’re apparently fighting terrorists). According to ABC News, the Bush Administration is suppressing a National Intelligence Estimate that describes the situation in Afghanistan as “grim”; specifically, there are “no plans” to declassify this report before the election, according to a well-placed government official.

In related news, Kim Jung Ill is suppressing news of how much of North Korea’s economy he embezzles, and the Kremlin is suppressing information of how many reporters they’ve bumped off.

Trauma Bonding is the sociological effect where, in traumatic times, victims of that trauma will cling to the most convenient source of authority as a means of protection, regardless of that entity’s connection to the source of that trauma. This is the root cause of Stockholm Syndrome.

9/11 is perhaps the most evident example of this. By constantly reminding people of 9/11 in the run up to the 2004 election, the GOP was able to remind Americans of the trauma that the threat of terrorism causes them to feel. Out of a misplaced sense of desperation, Americans (or at least, the gullible ones) clung to perceived authority of the Bush Administration, even thought it was ultimately responsible for the 9/11 attacks in the first place.

The GOP is doing it again, but this time to women. After centuries of striving for empowerment, Hillary Clinton narrowly failed to grasp the Democratic Nomination. This feeling of being snubbed has been so traumatic to many of Hillary Clinton’s supporters that, out of desperation, they’re clinging to Sarah Palin as a feminism-related authority figure.

This is just what the GOP hoped for. The GOP is using trauma bonding (and the prospect of a female Vice President) to seduce women into supporting a misogynist Presidential candidate, his pied-piping running mate, and the historically anti-feminist political party that they serve.

Recent news has come out that yet another self-professed Hillary Clinton “supporter” has jumped aboard theMcCain Puss- err, Bandwagon. This time, the naive wench is Lynn Forester de Rothschild, a prominent member of the DNC’s Platform Committee who, in her moments of clarity, helped Hillary Clinton raise over $100,000 in campaign contributions.

Earlier, Mrs. Rotshchild complained that she and 18 million other Hillary Clinton supporters were being asked to embrace party unification without what they perceived as fair representation.

This is another case of a silly woman talking out of her vagina. Her decision to abandon Hillary Clinton, her legacy, and her ideals to support an anti-feminist is not fueled by womens’ intuition. This poor decision is really the result of sense of estrogen-fueld rage.

If Mrs. Rothschild really believes that, if elected, McCain is going to give Hillary Clinton and her supporters fair representation, she’s in for a bigger surprise than Anne Boleyn was when she married Henry the 8th.

Rothschild, a Billionaire who splits her time between her mansions in London and New York, decided not to endorse Barack Obama because she perceives him as too “elitist”.

As I mentioned in part 1 of this blog, John McCain and Sarah Palin have no family values. I’ve exposed John McCain, not it’s Sara Palin’s turn.

Sara Palin is widely accused of having an affair with Scott Richter, one her husband’s business partners. The revelation of this now-suppressed scandal was, by some strange coincidence, immediately followed by Scott Richter’s emergency court motion to seal his divorce records.

Since this motion was denied, the 98 Page divorce records are available for public scrutiny. According to an official review of them, Sarah Palin is mentioned in Scott Richter’s sealing request. The random mention of your coworker’s wife in a divorce records sealing request seems a bit unusual, no?

Speaking of sex, the unexpected pregnancy of Bristol Palin, Sarah Palin’s underage, unwed daughter, speaks volumes about the failings of “abstinence-only” education. As Bristol has demonstrated, keeping your daughter in the dark about safe sex only helps prevent pregnancy if the parents can control who is fucking her.

If responsible parenting doesn’t work, Sara Palin offers another method of preventing unwanted pregnancies: Shotgun Weddings. Rather than suffer the embarrassment of a bastard grandchild, force your daughter into a marriage built only on lust. This is what Sarah Palin did when she pressured Bristol to elope before the scandalous news of her pregnancy broke. Or her water, for that matter.

On top of this, Sarah Palin has a special-needs, infant son who, along with her pregnant daughter, she is willing to neglect for her own pursuit of power.

Anybody who has tried to play the “family values” drinking game during televised McCain/Palin rallies has probably found themselves in a disappointing state of sobriety.

Why are they silent on this usually exciting buzz phrase? Because to repeat it would expose them to the media’s embarrassing spotlight and the hypocrisy it would reveal.

Let’s expose John McCain first. Carol, his devoted starter wife, was nearly killed in a car wreck on Christmas Eve, 1969. This near-death experience left her permanently scarred and crippled, despite the 3 years of agonizing surgery she had to endure. Her modelesque beauty destroyed, Carol nonetheless withheld the tragic news of her accident from John in order to help him survive his torturous internment in a Vietcong death camp.

Upon his return from Vietnam, John McCain was horrified to discover that his trophy wife had become a hideous gimp. He thanked Carol for her compassion by cheating on, and then abandoning, her and their three children for his new mistress, whose comparative beauty, youth, and ridiculous wealth he had somehow come to appreciate.

So yes, here are John McCain’s “family values”. And John McCain seems to share my bleak assessment of them. Or at least, he did when he wrote the following in his memoir: “my marriage’s collapse was attributable to my own selfishness and immaturity…I cannot escape blame”.

According to an article in the Huffington Post, Former Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan has said that this is the Worst Economy he had ever seen.

How incredibly convenient of him to say that. While Bush and his disastrous policies may have had a strong hand in pile-driving this economy into the ground, it’s awfully convenient for him not to mention the impact that his chairmanship of the Federal Reserve had in the economy.

This is one situation where another blogger can articulate things better than I can. Thanks, Tom Tomorrow: