06 Nov, 2008
The 10 Politically-Incorrect Puppy Breeds that Obama should avoid.
Posted by: James In: Humor
The Media is buzzing with the news that Barack Obama is going to give his daughters a new puppy, and people around the world are gossiping about what breed of dog he will choose. However, Barack Obama must be careful in choosing this puppy, as the wrong choice of puppy could offend his overly-sensitive constituents.
Here are the top 10 politically incorrect choices of Breeds:
1- German Shepherd.
German Shepherds have been forever “Godwinned” due to their preference among the Nazis. Choosing a German Shepherd puppy will likely cause Barack Obama’s Pro-Israel and Zionist Jewish constituents to kvetch.
2- Afghan Hound
This breed’s nominal association with Afghanistan, and by extension Al-Queda and Osama Bin Laden, will certainly inflame the passions of freepers, hard-line neoconservatives, and “Obama is a Muslim” conspiracy theorists.
3- Bloodhound
The Bloodhound is another breed with an unfortunate historical association. Slave holders frequently used Bloodhounds to track down, and sometimes kill, runaway slaves. Al Sharpton and the NAACP will have a field day if Barack Obama chooses a Bloodhound.
4- Chihuahua
Chihuahuas are closely associated with Mexicans, so choosing this breed will convince neoconservatives and freepers that Barack Obama must somehow sympathize with illegal immigrants.
5-Russian Spaniel
Choosing a Russian Spaniel, by the merit of the breed’s name, will also stoke neoconservatives and freepers, many of whom already believe that Barack Obama is a secret Socialist/Marxist/Communist.
6-Tibetan Spaniel
Tibet is fighting for it’s autonomy from Chinese dictatorship. While this choice of breed will doubtlessly please liberals, it will give the Chinese Government propagandic fodder with which to make international diplomacy more difficult.
7- St. Bernard
The St. Bernard is yet another breed with an unfortunate nominal association. Secularist and atheist wingnuts will see this as an endorsement of Religion, and Protestant wingnuts will see this as an endorsement of Catholicism.
8- American Eskimo
Choosing a breed that nominally targets a minority will offend the wingnuts who wish to accuse Barack Obama of racism.
9-Greyhound
Choosing a greyhound will be seen as product placement for Greyhound Bus Lines, and it will offend the Humane Society, which loathes Greyhound Racing.
10- Poodle
Poodles are tied to the idea of surrender and passive obedience, not only because they are French, but because Tony Blair was often regarded as George W. Bush’s poodle. Those who want to attack Barack Obama’s foreign policy ideology will go nuts over this choice of breed.
